Give me some surveillance

According to today's Telegraph, up to 1,000 new phones are being tapped each day, many by local councils.

I find this hard to believe, what on earth are the listening for? Grumblings from members of the Southport Party? The whispered sweet nothings of ill-starred lovers? I was going to ask the bods at Sefton Council who they are listening to, but I doubt they would tell me as they like to keep their cards close to their chests.

I would be happy to discover my phone was being tapped. It would add spice to my otherwise dull existence to know that I was caught up in some sort of Smiley's People type of plot.

If you are reading this, Carol, give a discreet cough next time you listen in, so I know you are there and can make my conversation suitably fruity and mysterious.